It’s hard to describe how one can have a good regret, but I actually do. I deeply regret my actions from earlier – however I believe that I made a good choice and it was the right thing to do. Allow me explain…
My co-worker and running partner, Walt, collects change and tools he finds along the road while running. He’s found quite a few. He displays them on his file cabinet for everybody to see. It’s fun – in an odd sort of way. He’s found, over time, probably a couple dollars worth of change as well. That’s pretty cool.
Today – I was “kitting up” (bike geek for getting dressed to go for your ride) when I realized I was quite hungry. I didn’t want to ride. If I didn’t eat a little something, i was going to be grumpy and annoyed through my entire ride. I headed upstairs to get a healthy snack.
As the cork screw turned to give me my rice crispy treat, I realized there was a nugget of love in there. A whole sweet offering from the vending machine gods! They have blessed me with a wonderful honey bun! Oh… this SURELY is a good reason to eat such a wonderful treat! I didn’t seek out this little lustful nugget! It just fell into my hands, literally!
Overjoyed and ready to consume, I gathered the offering and headed downstairs. What would I do with my rice crispy treat? Not the healthiest, but why would I need 150 calorie small snack when I had this FIVE HUNDRED CALORIE brick of sugar and spice? Surely I wouldn’t want to add on the extra 4 grams of fat from the rice crispy treat to my TWENTY FOUR GRAMS of fat in the honey bun, now would I?
Yes … I read the label and realized this was not an offering from the vending machine gods, rather an attack from the fat ass god! It was trying to keep me in his realm. Just another example of somebody trying to hold a man down!
I took this finding, this offering from the augmented keister klub and gave it to Walt. I put it on his file cabinet as it was found during a period of the day associated with working out, I felt it would be better off there. This is where the regret has set in. I’m groggy and hungry and the expanded buttocks gods are telling me… “Go get the honey bun…. go get the honey bun….” I’ve got it under control now. I won’t go retrieve it. I’ve put it in the museum of workout goodness, where it shall remain … at least until somebody steals it and/or it turns green!
I think I did the right thing… from experience, those packaged honey buns are always disappointing.
I could not resist the sticky, sweet high-caloric goodness of the Honey Bun this morning.